The Guilt
I have started working pretty much full time hours over the last few months, juggling being a mom, a wife, a busy entrepreneur, and I have come to the conclusion that no matter how I split my time, I will be forever guilt ridden.
If I let my work slide and spend it with the kids and hubby, I feel guilty for not giving my all to my career (or my one day carerr lol). If I spend more time working I feel really GUILTY for letting my work get in the way of my family. I have spoken to lots of mom's out there that have worked since their kids were born and they tell me that there is no happy medium. This sucks.
I was so happy with my decision to be a stay at home mom, then when the boys started going to school full time, I thought, okay now I get to pickup my career where I left off. I don't really know how to fit it in though.
I drop the kids off to school at 8:20am, rush home, tidy up breakfast dishes, throw a load of laundry in, get my work out, work until 11:15am pick them up for lunch, throw lunch in their faces, get them back out the door for 12:15pm, come home work until 2:40pm, pick the boys up from school, feed them after school snacks, do homework, prepare dinner, serve dinner, clean up dinner, run baths get jammies on them, read them a bedtime story, tuck them in...then it is time to be a good wife and listen to DH's day, cuddle for a little bit, maybe squeeze in some SEX :)By then I am exhausted. I have started to get up at 4:45am to work in some piece and quiet until around 7:am.
If someone out there in internet space has an answer on how to juggle these things around, or how to just stop feeling guilty...please let me in on the secret. Thanks...
posted by Not Your Regular Mini Van Mom @ 6:44 AM
5 Comments
5 Comments:
I think there will be guilt no matter what we do as moms.
I am a full time SAHM and I feel guilty that I'm not spending enough QUALITY time with my kids, that I'm not preparing healthy enough dishes, that I'm not volunteering at their school enough, that I'm not the best wife I could be....
I could go on and on with that list. But I try to do the best I can and realize that no matter what I do, I'm always going to feel like it's not good enough.
So I guess, hang in there and enjoy the ride!
Wow, that's a busy day! Do you do this every day? Can you devote certain days of the week to working?
I think women are just built to feel guilty. Totally sucks.
You described my life for many, many years! Three years ago, I finally decided it wasn't functioning, and I cut back on my work. I am lucky that I had that option, and for me it's been the right decision. I am my own boss, so I was able to reduce the workload more easily than many might.
Now, I have more time for my boys, more time for my husband, and more time for ME!
I wish you the best of luck with your situation, and hope eventually you will be able to find some balance that works for you and your family. :)
Heidi
I decided last year to take the year off! Just got to graduate school, and hang with my boys. It will help a little when we move in June and I go back to work!
There's no single answer. Funny thing is, there's not many working (paid! ok?) mums who manage to blog as well.
You must be doing better than you think!
My tactic is to try not to multi-task. If it's work hours, I work. If it's mum-time, enjoy it. I've not given myself time for guilt so I CAN'T focus on that.
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